Right around seventh grade is when the voice of “you’re not good enough” began to whisper in my ear. It came through comments and snickers of fellow classmates and sometimes even people I considered friends. Comments like, “she’s ugly,” “her nose is too big,” and “she dresses funny” began to tarnish what I thought about myself. The voice was persistent enough that I began to believe what other people thought about me, and gave into the pressure of wanting to be liked at any cost. I learned quickly how to “fit in” by changing what I wore, how I talked, and what I was into. As long as I was feeding my need to feel secure through other’s approval, I felt okay about being me. Before long all that was left were pieces of that once secure little girl.
That same voice and feelings of insecurity and inadequacy followed me into high school and adulthood. My addiction to approval caused me to make some choices I wish I never had, and walk down some paths I was never meant to travel. It wasn’t until my mid-twenties where I came to a cross-roads of continuing on a path that even after all my efforts I would still come up empty, or drowning out the voice of insecurity with the voice of truth.
I had a relationship with the Lord, but an erroneous view on His love for me. I thought I had to be perfect for God to love me. The concept of unconditional love had become foreign to me because of the many cruel remarks of my past. I didn’t look to Christ for my affirmation, nor did I whole heartily believe what He said about me. I passed over the scriptures that said, “I’m fearfully and wonderfully made,” and assumed He must be talking about someone else.
When lies have been so embedded in your mind it’s not an easy thing to rid yourself of them. Finding my security in Christ has been a process. In order to begin the healing process, I had to allow God to visit the areas where I was severely wounded by people’s words and actions. I had to make a choice to believe that what God said about me was true, and to see myself the way He saw me.
I don’t think there is anyone in the world who has escaped the sting of hurtful words or labels, but we don’t have to continue to accept them as truth. The key to finding security in Christ is to revoke every negative label you’ve been given. When the lies of the enemy begin to echo in your ear, you need to combat the lies with the truth of the scripture. One way I do this is by compiling a list of what God says about me. I’ve put together a list of a few things God thinks about us. Use them to remind yourself that it’s only God’s opinion of you that matters.
God says I am:
A new creation
Created in His Image
Created for a purpose
Fearfully and wonderfully made
The apple of His eye
The light of the world
Temple of the holy spirit
Adopted into God’s family
Co-heir with Christ
A prayer to pray:
God, when I’m feeling insecure, help me to look to you to find my security. Help me believe that I am all that you say I am. May your voice become louder than all the labels and hurtful words that I have endured. I choose to believe what you say about me! In Jesus’ name, Amen.